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Why did the mustard win the race?

December 11, 2009 in Funny

Why did the mustard win the race?
Because the ketchup couldn’t catch up.
If April showers bring May flowers, then what do Mayflowers bring?
What has a mouth but never eats, a bed but never sleeps, and a bank but has no money?
A river.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
She saw a good looking rooster on the other side!
Why didn’t the shark eat the woman?
Because it was a man eating shark.
Why did the orange roll down the hill?
Because it run out of juice.
What do soccer players, basketball players and newborn babies have in common?
They dribble.
What’s black and white and read all over?
A newspaper.
If H2O is on the inside of a fire hydrant, what is on the outside?
How deep does a frog like the water?
Knee deep.
How many vampires does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None.They prefer the dark!
How do porcupines play leapfrog?

What Can You Keep But Not Share It?

May 13, 2009 in Riddles

What Can You Keep But Not Share It, And If You Share It You Can’t Keep It?

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